I found this book Calm My Anxious Heart, by Linda Dillow in the book store at my church. I decided to purchase it and see what others had to say about anxiety. I have read the book and have a lot to say about the book - it is fabulous, well written, scripture based, and provokes self examination and thinking - some of which is not always easy. I am willing to admit that there are things she recommends that I am not yet ready to face, but with time and the Lord's help perhaps I will get there.
In the beginning of the book she tells a story about Ella who is a daughter of her dear friend Mimi. I assume Mimi has passed away as Ella was going through Mimi's diaries where she discovered Ella's prescription for contentment:
- Never allow yourself to complain about anything - not even the weather
- Never picture yourself in any other circumstances or somplace else
- Never compare your lot with another's
- Never allow yourself to wish this or that had been otherwise.
- Never dwell on tomorrow - remember that [tomorrow] is God's not ours
With my fiance being in Wisconsin and the children and I being here it is often easy to get caught up in our desire to be together as a family - either here or there. The change in thinking is to focus on what God is teaching us through this time of learning about each other over distance. Look for the bright spots, look for the laughter and the fun we can have together even this far apart.
Never compare my lot with another's... this used to be easy as when I worked I had mostly what the children and I always needed and sometimes wanted. They and I have learned to live without almost all our wants and to pass on even a few of our needs. When I drive by the fancy houses for sale I have to admit that I think how nice it would be live there - but on the other hand... I'm so happy where I am and with what I have. I think it is way to easy to get wrapped up in what the world tries to sell us.
I am where I am because I have been where I have been. The Lord made me specifically to be me. I may have made some choices that He would have wished I chose otherwise... but I'm happy with who I am... I'm 43 and finally happy with who I am... it takes some of us a while longer than it does some others.
I have to say that I often look forward to tomorrow or what the future holds - but that is seldom my focus anymore... now I enjoy each day as it comes and each moment I get to spend with my children; even when they are driving me a bit nuts. I used to look 3 or 4 years ahead into the future and worry about where my career will be - now I know... my life is my children and the growing of my knowledge and relationship with the Lord. He will provide for all our needs - always.
So has my anxious heart been calmed? Absolutely NOT... is it calmer than it has been in the past YES. Am I still on the journey as I continue to study the lessons in this book and the lessons of our Lord ABSOLUTELY --- the difference is that now I know where the focus should be and I'm happy on the path of my journey.
Peace,
Gretchen
